The ultimate battle is being fought amongst members of a superior race.

X-Men Evolution is a cartoon that aired for four seasons from 2000-2003. In this cartoon, which is based on the widely popular Marvel Comics characters, The X-Men, a superior race of evolved humans, discover their powers thanks to a mutant gene that activates during their teenage years.

Cast of Characters

The X-Men series follows the lives of two groups of teenagers. The first group is the X-Men, who live with Professor Xavier at the Institute for Gifted Youngsters. The Institute is the guise for a training facility where Xavier trains his pupils in the art of controlling and honing their X-factored abilities.

The second group is a group that rejected the offer to join Xavier at the Institute. Instead, they follow the direction of Magneto, a nemesis of the X-Men, and the principal of the school, Raven Darkholme, who is better known as Mystique.

One unique thing about this series is both groups attend the same high school, Bayville High. They must learn to co-exist, which leads to many confrontations. At the end of the first season, the X-Men teenagers learn the principal is actually their enemy, Mystique. Though this is upsetting to them, they do not blame Professor Xavier from trying to protect them.

The X-Men

The X-Men in X-Men Evolution include:

Scott Summers (Cyclops) - Scott is one of the first characters in X-Men Evolution that we meet. He is in episode 1-1 - "Strategy X". In the episode, we quickly discover Scott’s special powers, as a jock named Duncan Matthews knocks his protective glasses off his face. When his eyes are exposed, Cyclops can emit optic blasts from them. That is why he wears the glasses.

Scott was sticking up for (surprisingly enough) another mutant named Todd "The Toad" Tolensky (originally known as Mortimer Toynbee in the comics). Before the police can arrive, Jean Grey, another of the X-Men, gets Scott his glasses, so they can return to the institute.

Jean Grey - Also known as Marvel Girl in the comic books, Jean Grey is a relatively weak-powered (in the beginning episodes) telepath. Jean can also use telekinesis to move objects. Fans of the comic can tell you how powerful Jean really becomes.

Jean is very close to Scott. She is often sent by Professor X to help recruit new students. She has a calming, caring nature about her, which makes her the ideal choice to help recruit new members to the Institute/X-Men team.

James "Logan" Howlett/Wolverine - Wolverine is one of the adults in the series. Quite a powerful X-Men member, Wolverine is incredibly athletic with animalistic instincts. He has advanced smelling capabilities and though it is not mentioned in X-Men Evolution, he has amazing healing abilities, as well. A fierce fighter, his signature weapons are his retractable claws, made of adamantium (a Marvel-created metal alloy), which were bonded to his skeleton against his will.

Ororo Munroe/Storm - Ororo Monroe (Auntie O to Spyke) is another adult who helps Professor X train the students at the Institute. Storm, who is believed to be not only the most popular but also the first African-American superhero ever created (in 1975 by X-Men writer Len Wein), is able to summon and control weather patterns.

In particular, she can use the rain, lightening, fog, snow, etc. to her advantage. For example, the wind helps Storm take flight, and thunderstorms can be used in battle or it can be used to conceal another X-Men member’s location from an enemy.

Professor X/Charles Xavier - As it was mentioned previously, Professor X is in charge of the Institute and founder of the X-Men team. He is a paraplegic, who is always seen in his motorized wheelchair. Professor X is brilliant. He is a gifted scientist with amazing information on genetics, and understanding of how the X-Gene mutation works.

Xavier possesses the X gene as well. He is an incredibly powerful telepath. He can control and influence the minds of others, to the point of what could be construed as abusive if used for the wrong purposes.

Katherine "Kitty" Pride/Shadowcat - In episode 1-2 "The X-Impulse", we meet Kitty Pride. A confused girl, who wants to deny her powers, Kitty is pursued by Lance Alvers who possesses the X-gene. Lance wants Kitty to help him break into the school office, steal test answers, and change grades. Luckily, she is also being watched over by Jean Grey and Professor X who have come to help her understand her gift and invite her to the Institute.

Kitty has the ability to become transparent. She can pass through walls and objects, as well as allow others she is touching to do the same. In the comic book, this power is more advanced where she is able to disrupt fields of electricity with her transparency. Kitty, though portrayed as a typical teenager, is of genius intelligence and (though touched upon only briefly) is an expert at computers.

Kurt Wagner/Nightcrawler - In episode 1-1 "Strategy X", we are introduced to a blue, fuzzy teenager named Kurt. Kurt is a practical jokester who loves to have fun. As a result, he often clashes with the down-to-business, overly serious Scott. Kurt is originally from Germany and it is clear he has recently learned English, as he does not always understand American slang.

Kurt has the ability to teleport. He is also incredibly agile, and loves to hang from the ceilings like a bat. Kurt is often compared to the devil/elf, as he has a tail, pointy ears, and glowing eyes. Despite this, he is devoutly religious (outside this series) and is truly one of the good guys. In episode 1-10 "Shadowed Past", it is revealed through Rogue’s dreams that Mystique is the mother of Kurt.

Rogue - In season one, Rogue is mysterious. She was originally raised by Destiny at the request of Mystique. Rogue knows she is adopted, but knows nothing of her birth parents While Destiny and Mystique knew what Rogue’s powers would be they did not know when they would activate.

To protect her and others from her incredibly strong powers, she was told by Destiny that she should avoid contact with others since she had a -made up- skin condition. In episode 1-3, "Rogue Recruit", a boy who is interested in Rogue named Cody Robbins asks Rogue to dance at the school dance. As Cody and Rogue make contact, her powers go haywire, placing Cody in some sort of coma.

Confused, Rogue, a Southern belle turned goth girl (at least in this series), is met by Mystique, who convinces her the X-Men are evil by shape-shifting into them and trying to harm Rogue as members of the X-Men team. As the X-Men team arrives, Rogue goes nuts, and eventually ends up with Mystique though she is suspicious of everyone.

Rogue has the ability to touch a person and render them unconscious as she takes their memories and any powers they possess (if they have the X-gene).

Later in the first season, in episode 1-9, "Survival of the Fittest", Rogue becomes an X-Men member, when she learns Mystique only wanted her to use her powers for evil.

Evan Daniels/Spyke - The youngest member of the X-Men is also the most immature. The nephew of Ororo, Evan Daniels has been hiding his powers from his Aunt. During a basketball game Ororo is attending, Spyke’s powers become visible to her, when he skids across the floor and spikes protrude from his arms. While she tries to convince Spyke he needs the Institute’s help to control his powers, Spyke has another idea.

Spyke is sparring with Pietro/Quicksilver, another Basketball player who ends up getting Spyke sent to jail, by trashing the school and leaving Spyke to take the fall. That is when Ororo and her brother tell Spyke he has little choice, but to go to the Institute. Throughout the series, the rivalry between Quicksilver and Spyke play out.

Spyke is the only X-Men in X-Men Evolution, who was not in the comic book originally. It is widely believed he was thrown in to help diversify the show, though he was one of the least popular characters on it.

Alex Masters (Summers)/Havok - In the last two episodes, 1-12 and 1-13, "The Cauldron Part One and Part Two", Scott’s little brother Alex is introduced. Scott believed Alex was killed in the plane crash that killed his parents. Instead, he was raised in Hawaii.

During a battle with a shark, in which he uses his hands to emit the same kind of optic blast his brother uses from his eyes, it is discovered Alex also possesses the X-gene.

X-Men Enemies

Magneto - The higher power in charge of the evil mutants, Magneto is the true leader of the Brotherhood of Mutants. Magneto is seen as the antagonist to Professor X’s protagonist. Magneto is seen in various episodes though none as prominent as in episodes 1-12 and1-13, "The Cauldron Part One and Part Two", where he has X-Men battle enemy mutants. The winner of each battle is brought to a special training ground Magneto created, where he plans to exploit their power and help them form a superior fellowship free of prying human eyes.

Magneto is portrayed as evil, and the fact that he survived the Holocaust is not mentioned in this series, which was primarily geared towards kids. The moral dilemma from Magneto’s existence is far too complex for any involvement in a series on Kids WB.

Magneto, as his name implies, is able to control magnetism in objects.

Raven/Mystique - Mystique is a powerful shape shifter, who can change into both humans and animals. She can use X-Men powers to her advantage by shape shifting into a specific X-Men member. Mystique is depicted by her blue skin.

She is the mother of Nightcrawler, leads the evil enemy teen group, and is the leader (face value) of the Brotherhood of Mutants. She helps Magneto run it, even though he did something evil to her baby Nightcrawler, which led to him being dropped in the river and discovered downstream by a ‘normal’ human family where he was raised.

Lance Alvers/Avalanche - Introduced in episode 1-2, "The X-Impulse", Lance is an orphan, who tries to get Kitty to use her powers to do bad things. He sees himself as superior to humans and fits in well with the Brotherhood, who recruits him, bringing him to Bayville High.

In the comics, Avalanche is known by the name Dominic Petros, not Lance Alvers. Lance is able to create earthquakes (by stomping his foot so it seems), and though not touched upon in season one, can also make materials disintegrate.

Fred Dukes/The Blob - The Blob was one of the first enemies of the X-Men in the comic books. In X-Men Evolution, the Blob is a large (tall and wide) mutant with super strength. In the beginning of episode 1-4, "Mutant Crush", he is seen being treated like a sideshow act at a Monster truck rally. It is clear that people see him as a freak.

Fred meets Jean and becomes infatuated with her. He grows jealous of Scott, whom is very protective of Jean. Fred demands that Jean go on a date with him, and when she does not agree, he knocks her out, carries her off, and ties her up to force her on the date.

The Blob does not appear to be overly intelligent. He is not fond of the X-Men or anyone really, as most of them laugh and pick on him. Of course, the result is disastrous if he tries to throw a locker at them in retaliation.

Todd "The Toad" Tolensky - Todd is a slimy, toad-like character. He is depicted as a loser, who hangs out with the bad guys, just to be a pest to the X-Men. Toad has the ability to leap like a frog, eat bugs, and has a super long tongue that is reminiscent of Ed, Edd, and Eddy (green).

He is first seen in episode 1-1 "Strategy X", when two jocks catch him stealing money at a football game. They are holding him up against a wall, when Scott comes to his aid (in order to prevent trouble).

Pietro Maximoff/Quicksilver - Though not mentioned in season one of X-Men Evolution, Pietro is the son of Magneto and twin of the Scarlett Witch, who is introduced in another season of this series. Pietro is the arch-nemesis of the X-Men Evolution created character, Spyke.

The animosity between the boys lands Spyke in jail for Pietro’s crimes. Pietro has super-fast speed. When airborne, he can use his legs to create a tornado-like object. Pietro is arrogant and believes he is unstoppable. This leads to many problems for the X-Men.

Victor Creed/Sabretooth - Introduced briefly as the arch-nemesis to Logan/Wolverine, Sabretooth was also used in experiments by the government (which created Wolverine’s retractable claws). His skeleton is covered in adamantium, he has advanced healing powers, incredible strength, enhanced senses, animal instincts, and sharp fangs and claws.

The Series - Season One

X-Men Evolution was developed with kids in mind. It is clean, fun, and has an excellent message. While some X-Men purists do not like any deviations made from the comics, many of these deviations actually enhance the story.

The teenagers in the original comics lived in the 1960’s. That is a different time/era and the writers took the liberty to give X-Men Evolution a more modern feel. Though there is a cheese factor (yes, Scott even says "Sike" in one episode) the overall appearance of the show can be enjoyed by both adults and kids.

Season one is the introduction to the entire series. The first five or so episodes introduce you to one or two new characters. You have a chance to get to learn about each one, receive background information on them, and then you can make your assessment of whether you are going to like them or not in future episodes and seasons.

The Bottom Line - If you are a fan of X-Men and can accept the interpretations and liberties made by the creators of the series, you will love X-Men Evolution. It is a great series for those who are new to X-Men.

While you should understand that the stories in the comics do differ, the overall message and abilities of the X-Men are portrayed. In the end good will triumph and evil, while punished, will walk home with their tails between their legs until tomorrow, when the next battle will begin.

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Written by Dominick - Visit Website
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Dominick Evans is in his late 20’s. He spends his days working as a full time writer/editor and a part time musician/composer. His passions in life include music, directing films, watching movies, reading books, watching sports, wheelchair football, politics and spending time with his family (fiancée Ashtyn, son Robert, and shih-tzu Oliver). Other interests include being an advocate for the disability and GLBT communities.

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In the beginning of The End, we meet the Baudelaire children, Violet, Klaus, and Sunny, in a boat with Count Olaf. The four have escaped from a fire at the Hotel Denouement. There, it is believed the Baudelaire children deliberately set fire to the hotel, killing members of the secret group, VFD.

Certain of their impending arrest, the Baudelaires drop off into a boat from one of the hotel balconies. The boat has no steering or motor capabilities. The wind and the makeshift paddles the Baudelaires use, act as their guide as they head out into the middle of the ocean.

After some time, and too many meals of canned beans (courtesy of chef, Sunny), the Baudelaires and the evil Count are trapped in a storm that rips apart their boat. They end up shipwrecked on an island, where all sorts of things happen, and life passes by. The Baudelaires have little contact with civilization. No one truly knows where they are, and so the Baudelaires must make do with what washes ashore, and what they have.

Some questions are answered outright, such as what happens to Count Olaf and where their friend Kit is. These answers may surprise even the most devout, A Series of Unfortunate Events fan. However, the bittersweet ending in The End for these characters brought forth a new beginning. Without such a beginning, there would be no end or no beginning. There would be no tales to tell of the Baudelaires. The End would simply not exist, and yet it does.

A Closer Analysis

The End is only The End if you want it to be The End. Most people, not even adults, will notice the significance of The End, nor will they understand the purpose of its inception. If you use deductive reasoning you can find out exactly who the baby is, why Lemony Snicket wrote the books, and whether the Baudelaire’s parents really are alive.

You must realize that The End is not going to end the Baudelaires lives nor was the first book, The Bad Beginning, truly the beginning of it. As Lemony Snicket said himself, “.but it cannot be said that The End contains the end of the Baudelaires story anymore than The Bad Beginning contained it’s beginning.” – The End pg. 287.

“We might even say that the world is always in medias res — a Latin phrase that means in the midst of things or in the middle of a narrative — and that it is impossible to solve any mystery, or find the root of any trouble, and so the end is really the middle of the story, as many people in this history will live long past the close of chapter thirteen, or even the beginning of the story, as a new child arrives in the world at the chapter’s close.” – The End pg. 289.

True fans of Lemony Snicket are not seeing exactly what the End means. If all the questions were answered, there would be no more. The End would really be the end, and yet it isn’t the end, or at least it gives readers a chance to make The End their own.

No matter how this book ended, there would be those who did not like the ending. If the End implied the end of all, that meant everyone died and there was nothing left to tell but the End, because everything truly did end. However, if the children were saved from the island, reunited with their parents who did not really die, and they rode off into the sunset, fans would not be satisfied.

The ending would be cliché and unbefitting of the end of A Series of Unfortunate Events. The book series would be false, as the series of unfortunate events actually was a series of events leading up to a happily ever after.

The End of the Review of the The End

In the end, The End is a great book, and perhaps the most poetic of all the Snicket books (written by Daniel Handler). When reading this book, you will enjoy it only if you truly get the meaning behind the words. Do not read this book as you would any other book in this series.

The End is the beginning of a new adventure for the Baudelaires. Treat it as such and you will enjoy the ride. Sure, it would be nice to know the answers to all of the questions Lemony Snicket laid out throughout the series. It would also be nice to know all of the mysteries of the Earth. These questions may go unanswered forever, and if you can accept that then you have accepted The End, not as the end, but as the beginning of The End and the end of the beginning.

….The End…

Star Rating:

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Isabelle has a problem. Actually, she has quite a few problems. Just yesterday, she was a nice, well-adjusted girl waiting for her prom. Now she is out in the woods murdering Thumper with her bare hands, feasting on the raw bunny meat, and begging Daddy to touch her. Well, that’s putting what she asked for nicely. Some would call Isabelle a slut, but that is not a fair assessment. I prefer to say she is just in tune with her inner demons, literally.

We start with the priest. In the beginning, the Vatican wants to send him to school for exorcism. He refuses the offer despite the bishop recommending he pray. It is about then, thanks to the subject of the movie, you begin to realize that come exorcism time it is this priest that will be in the room.

Other than that, the priest comes and goes, relatively quickly in the beginning. We spend more time with the immediate family. We see mom and dad. Mom seems to be worried and trying to deal with the problems her daughter is facing. Meanwhile, the dad seems more worried about what mom is doing. It becomes painstakingly obvious that dad does not trust mom. In fact, every time a man comes in the room with her he is ready to beat the man up

.

The jealousy and the other sub-plot of the priest’s former relationship with Isabelle’s sister tend to take precedence over what should be the main plot of the movie, Isabelle’s possession. The demonic possession turns out to be stale and leaves you feeling unfulfilled. The possession is played out by a few body wiggles, some mind games, and a little bit of jumping around. At times, Isabelle hides in the closet.

However, the possession part of the movie is not played out enough to truly be interesting. You get the feeling that you come into the movie right as she is ready to be exorcised. We see a day or two into Isabelle’s life. This does not allow us to see the weird events that bring us to the exorcism. It is implied that her behavior has been bad and she needs help. She’s seen doctors and they can’t help her. Now we need a priest.

The exorcism is played out after way too much supplemental action is played out. The demon enjoys playing mind tricks, which do not really involve Isabelle or the actresses’ acting. However, they do lead to some other characters being hurt and/or hurting others.

We soon get to the conclusion of the movie and determine the problems with the demon and how to get rid of him. By the end of the movie I had laughed, shook my head, and was otherwise unaffected. The acting was mediocre, the direction was basic, and the camera angling was familiar for B-movies, which was fine because that’s what this movie was.

The Bottom Line: BlackwaterValley Exorcism had a chance to be a good movie. Exorcism movies do fairly well and can be interesting and even scary if they are done right. Sadly, this movie was not done as well as one would have hoped. In the end it is an exorcism movie that has elements of a Soap Opera and a Lifetime movie. Unfortunately, this just doesn’t work for the diehard exorcist fans. Ah well, better luck next time.

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From the vibrant aristocracy and a host of interesting characters including New York City mayor, George McClellan, to the underworld of the gritty New York streets and back there is not a moment you can miss in this book without feeling a bit cheated.

As a former student of Criminal Justice, I took great interest in the psychoanalytical aspect of the book as the main character took charge over an amnesiac socialite teenager all while searching for her attacker, who was also the murderer of another young woman. It is in
the nature of a CJ professional to want to analyze a criminal, and the main character, Dr. Stratham Younger, does so with vigor, and the help of some of the most important analytical minds in history.

To further complicate the story, Rubensfeld intricately intertwines real life New York City in 1909 and the first and last visit Sigmund Freud made to America with the fictional world. It has long been disputed exactly why Freud never returned to America after just one trip. Rubensfeld fills in the gaps while leaving it open-ended enough for the reader to make their own conclusions.

With Freud comes his prized pupil, Carl Jung. Through the observations of the “first-person” Younger-told story, Jung is portrayed as aloof. Of course, Rubensfeld also leaves an air of mystery about his teacher, Freud.

While some see Freud as the father of sexual psychoanalysis, others view him as a quack. In this book, Rubensfeld leaves enough to the imagination to appease those from either schools of thought, especially as Younger questions whether Freud’s situational analyses are correct or not.

As murder and mayhem set the scene in The Interpretation of Murder, the pieces of the book fall into place nicely. While the story is
primarily told through the eyes of the protagonist, Younger, Rubensfield easily switches to the third-person style, characteristic in books when the main character simply cannot know what is happening outside their scope of vision.

To say that Rubensfeld researched the historical aspects of the book is an
understatement. As only a skilled story master can do through their prose, you actually experience the world Rubensfeld created during the moments you are enraptured in the book.

As the story fits together and the pieces of the puzzle are put into place, the ending reveals the observations of Younger - or are they Rubensfeld himself speaking through his character? Regardless, the only disappointing part of the book is the cliché ending for Stratham Younger. Of course, so many other things are happening at this point, I did not let that bother me too much.

Star Rating:

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I can describe this movie in one word…disturbing. I have been watching horror movies all month for Halloween and I have yet to see something that affected me like this movie did. The entire plot of Hard Candy is original and thought provoking. The concept, when brought out, was risky. The movie rests on the shoulders of two actors. Those actors, Ellen Page and Patrick Wilson, were simply amazing. I have not seen a movie so good in a very long time and if you stop reading right now, I sincerely hope it is to go watch this movie.

Hayley mentions meeting and Jeff agrees to meet her at a local coffee shop. They have been speaking on the Internet for 3 weeks and now it’s time to meet. She says her sister will drop her off and she will meet him in an hour. So far, so good, but then we are only about five minutes into the film.

At the coffee shop we see a shy, yet somewhat flirty Hayley with Jeff, a man who is obviously interested and yet attempts to restrain himself all at the same time. Jeff seems to realize that he shouldn’t be there with the 14 year old Hayley and yet he is. It makes his character shady from the beginning. Of course, to further complicate things, he is relatively attractive and seems like a nice guy. Hayley, while shy, seems like she is flirting with trouble, as many girls her age would do, so right off the bat, the movie has become interesting.

Soon after the meeting, Jeff is attempting to say goodbye and Hayley is tempting him to take her to his home. She wins and soon we are in Jeff’s home with Hayley. It does not take long for things to get out of control. While at one point, I was worried about Jeff being a pedophile I soon switch gears and started to wonder if Hayley is applying for the Future Serial Killers of America Club.

The movie becomes terrifying and I have yet to meet a man that can sit through one particular portion without thanking a deity or two that it’s not him in Jeff’s shoes. While you soon realize both parties are guilty of their own atrocities in this film, you cannot (or at least I cannot) help but sympathize with the man I once referred to as a pedophile.

Jeff is a likable character. This is one of the scariest things about him. He is charming, friendly, and seems easy to talk to about any subject. It would be easy to trust him. This, of course, makes it bad for the 14-year-old girls to whom he is attracted. Despite this, I was rooting for him a good portion of the movie. While I wouldn’t normally do this, the character and Wilson’s acting had me from Hello or something like that.

Hayley also peaked my interest but in a different way. Perhaps it was my former Criminal Justice education but from the moment I saw her in the coffee shop, Hayley had me worried. There was something about her I didn’t like. I did not want to trust her from the get go. Perhaps it was because her shy, demure attitude seemed phony, or too much like an act to be real.

I do not know if other moviegoers felt differently, but for me, I just kept asking myself what her motivation was for being there, flirting, and trying to go home with a man she has just met. I knew something was amiss. While Jeff (and most men) may not have picked it up, to me it appeared that she was trying too hard.

Hard Candy depends on psychology, mind games, and primal survival instincts to carry the story. I ran the gamut of emotions and came out feeling as if I had been attacked, as well. All signs of a very good movie. Most movies cannot manage with pure dialogue, small amounts of action, and just two people. However, Hard Candy did this job, and did it well.

There is only one scene in the movie that I deem to be supplemental enough to not be necessary, though I can see why it was added. Sandra Oh has a cameo and does a brief scene with Ellen Page’s character Hayley. The scene is not exactly important and kind of throws people off the main story, but the filmmakers deemed it important enough to keep it in the final cut.

In the scene, Oh, who plays the neighbor of Jeff, knocks on the door and Hayley, thinking it is someone else, answers the door. The scene is good because it shows us vulnerability in Hayley, though this vulnerability soon fades to show her true colors once more.

If you like psychological thrillers, mild gore, and huge mind games you will love Hard Candy. You might even think it is one of the best movies of the year. If nothing else, it will certainly give older men a reason to date in their own age range.

Bottom Line: Hard Candy was far more interesting a movie than I had originally anticipated. The acting and directing were stellar and it helps the movie to shine. If you are a fan of movies that leave you astounded and angry than you need to buy this movie. Your collection will not be complete without Hard Candy.

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They say the most terrifying movies are those that could really happen. Perhaps that is why, after watching Children of the Corn for the thousandth (or is it millionth?) time I still feel chills run up and down my spine.

The other children in Gatlin had been busy having a private meeting with a boy named Isaac (John Franklin). However, Malachai (Courtney Gains) and the other children are back in town. Things start to get weird when we see the teen waitress at the diner putting some sort of powder in the coffee. It does not take long for those who drink the coffee to start choking and gasping for air.

As pandemonium sets in, Mr. Henderson, the owner, tries to escape, as does Jobie’s dad, who had been talking on the telephone with Jobie’s mother. However, the doors have been locked. As a stunned Jobie (probably no more than six or seven years old) sits on the stool and watches, his father is killed with an axe, and Mr. Henderson is stabbed as his hand is cut off in some of the dining equipment.

The movie quickly changes to the present day and we meet Burt (Peter Horton) and Vicky (Linda Hamilton) in a motel room. It is Burt’s birthday, so Vicky wakes him up to sing to him in what I deem as one of the only worthless, supplemental scenes in the movie. We learn Vicky and Burt are lovers, heading out to Seattle where Burt has gotten a job as a doctor. He is about to start his residency, and as things move from the hotel room they turn towards the back roads, which Burt has decided to drive down on a scenic trip to Seattle from the east.

As the duo head into Nebraska, the scene returns to Gatlin. Three years have passed since the adults were all murdered by the children of the town. Isaac is instructing them. Though Job, his little sister Sarah (Anne Marie McEvoy), and another boy, Joseph, are not fond of Isaac’s teachings, the other children are devout followers. Isaac speaks for the “man behind the rows”. Though it is not stated clearly in the movie, these children deem the man behind the rows as their God, though this otherworldly being is obviously evil.

Sarah has psychic visions, which she has had from the moment the first murders of adults started. She can draw pictures that show scenes in the future. While crayons, drawing, music, and games are forbidden, Job and Sarah play anyway in their old home to pass the time. However, we first see these two kids when Joseph is trying to escape from Gatlin through the cornfields. He promises if he makes it out to come back to Gatlin for them, but as I am sure you have probably guessed, Joseph never makes it out.

Isaac has had a dream that Joseph runs off betraying the cult of corn children in the process. He sends Malachai into the cornfields to kill him. By a force of divine intervention (or should it be dumb luck?), with a slit throat, Joseph stumbles out of the corn field into the road just as Burt and Vicky are driving in the vicinity. As Burt looks away at Vicky, he slams into Joseph (who seemingly comes out of nowhere). Dr. Burt goes to check and see if he hit a large animal or a person. It does not take the good doctor long to find out that Joseph would have died anyway since his throat was deliberately cut.

As he looks into the cornfields, Burt finds Joseph’s suitcase. Thinking it might hold a clue, he takes it back to the car. He puts the dead body in his trunk and heads on to the next town in hopes of finding a phone to call for help. Of course, signs for the next town all say Gatlin, so we know Burt and Vicky are in for a world of trouble if they head off in that direction.

Of course, they do. Otherwise, it would be a short movie. Without spoiling the rest of the movie, let’s just say the Corn Children meet Vicky and Burt and they do not seem to like them very much. Isaac has been forewarned of their presence thanks to Sarah’s drawings.

The drawings were confiscated by Malachai. Isaac, finding Sarah’s gift of sight incredibly useful, decides to let Sarah and Job live even though drawing, crayons, music, and games are forbidden. This angers Malachai and provides quite a bit of tension throughout the rest of the movie.

Courtney Gains has moved on to star in many other things (such as Memphis Belle with Sean Astin and Eric Stotlz). He currently looks like a kinder, younger Danny Bonaduce from the Partridge family. It seems funny and almost hard to believe that he could look so evil, yet in Children of the Corn he does. It is one of the most effective parts of the movie.

Second, this is about children forming their own cult. They kill their parents for God. Look at how messed up kids are these days. Peer pressure leads them to follow their friends. Children are committing school shootings, and the release of movies such as the documentary Jesus Camp show just how religious children are becoming. What is to say some children will not form their own cult? There are eight-year-old preachers these days. They honestly believe they are doing God’s bidding. This makes the plot of Children of the Corn not that far fetched.

Third, the music just adds to the suspense. In this movie, the camera angles, music, which builds up and swells during the most suspenseful moments, and the way the film was actually pieced together make the film scary. You know something is going to happen, but you are not sure what. Even when you have watched it a million times, your heart starts pounding when you hear the strains of music building in a swelling crescendo of sound.

Bottom Line: While Children of the Corn has the typical 1980’s look, the main kids, Jobie and Sarah are cute so you sympathize with and remain interested in them. There are a few comedic moments, but overall, the movie is scary. That is why the movie is still worth watching twenty years after it was made.

I have ranked this movie #1 out of all seven of the Children of the Corn movies. You cannot get much better than this one.

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The only thing scary about this movie is the acting. The BAD ACTING (Hint Hint: TAWNY KITAEN) ruined this film.

The concept of Witchboard is not so bad. The Ouija (Wee-juh) board of one of the main characters is possessed. A person plays the board alone and a bunch of crazy things start happening. Good concept. It worked well in The Exorcist. Mr. Howdy was incredibly scary and Linda Blair was not to shabby either. Of course, in The Exorcist, the board was supplementary. In Witchboard, the plot is dependent on this cheap, cardboard life-ruiner.

Perhaps that is my first problem with the movie. I cannot get over the idea of making a piece of cardboard your main character. Necessary to the movie, sure…but the board should have received top billing in Witchboard. Of course, just what does this say about Ms. Kitaen’s acting?

The acting was a major problem for me. The movie centers on three main characters, other than the board. Linda Brewster (Kitaen) and Jim Morar (Todd Allen) are in a relationship and live together. Brandon Sinclair (Stephan Nichols) plays the nemesis of Jim who is also Linda’s ex-boyfriend. Witchboard presents one of those, they used to be best friends, but a girl came between them, sort of plots.

The character of Linda Brewster is necessary to the plot. However, the delivery, at the hands of Tawny Kitaen is somewhat torturous to watch. She may have done ok in White Snake videos, but there was that issue that she never had to speak in them. In Witchboard, she does not do a good enough job of scaring anything out of anyone.

The men in the film are better than Kitaen but her performance is so bad that it does not do much good. The shining light in this film only lasts for about five minutes in a small performance by Kathleen Wilhoite, who plays, psychic medium, Zarabeth. The character is loud, crass, and annoying, but she is supposed to be. In short, she’s just what the doctor ordered for this film, she just didn’t last long enough.

The Bottom Line: Witchboard was Kevin Tenney’s first film. His ideas are not the worst I have seen. The problem comes in the delivery. The initial idea is good but the development goes ignored. We have seen this pattern in other Tenney films such as Night of the Demons, which was far better but still lacking in so many ways.

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A friend recommended the game, Virtual Villagers: A New Home to me. I am always one to play a game that sounds fun. I also love any reality-based games where you control the lives of certain characters. This is partly why I was so interested in playing the game once I knew it existed.

Once I had Virtual Villagers, I was ready to play. The game was developed by Last Day of Work and it has been marketed as a GameHouse Game. According to the Virtual Villager website, Virtual Villagers: A NewHomeis the first chapter in a series of village simulations. This game was developed from the game Village Sim. In essence, Virtual Villagers: A New Home, is Village Sim with extra puzzles and some updated features.

The story for the game starts when you arrive with your villagers on the island of Isola. There are two women, three men, and a boy. You have washed up here after a volcano destroyed your former home. You must help your villagers survive and repopulate on the island.

It seems easy enough, especially when you turn off your computer and go into real time mode. This means your game keeps going while you are asleep, away, etc. If you are going to be away from your computer for a while, it is recommended that you pause your game. This way you have some control over what happens in your village.

Real time mode is the ONLY thing that saved this game for me. If you are impatient (like I tend to be), I highly recommend you consider not purchasing Virtual Villagers. The goal of the game is simple. You must teach your villagers to build, research, heal (as a doctor/healer), reproduce, and farm in order to solve sixteen puzzles.

This sounds simple, but since the game plays in real time it takes what seems like FOREVER to get anywhere in the game. If you put your villagers “preferred” job on research, and one on farming, you will be okay. Some people say they run out of food, but I did not have that problem.

You want to get your girl pregnant as soon as possible and try to get someone building between researching. However, research is the most important thing to get points on if you want to survive. Once you get so many research points you can unlock numerous levels that help you advance as a farmer, builder, parent, spiritually, etc.

Try to avoid having both of your women pregnant. You may have to watch the girls because they may try to start reproducing when you are not looking. However, once a girl has a baby she is pretty much stuck and is unable to help with anything until the baby turns two years old.

Children really cannot do anything but see mushrooms. These add a little bit to the food bin. However, mushrooms do disappear quickly so you have to show them the mushroom right away. Otherwise, children are pretty much useless (minus one special child but I do not want to ruin that part of the game for you).

For the first few days, expect to be BORED out of your skull. You may just want to turn off your game and check it periodically. Otherwise, you will be sitting around doing pretty much nothing at all.

Once the game gets hopping, it becomes somewhat enjoyable. As long as you can build enough huts, you can max out your population at 90 or so. I once had twins though so the population did rise to 91 once, but I
believe 90 is usually the max for villagers. You can also start solving the puzzles slowly, but surely.

Once your population grows like crazy, research goes so much more quickly, you are able to unlock the additional levels easily. Those levels help you advance on the puzzles and for a moment, you think sitting around and waiting for Virtual Villagers: A New Home to get exciting was actually worth the wait.

Guess again!

What happens after you have gotten this far? I am sure you may have guessed it…nothing! Absolutely nothing happens and you just keep on living. It is the biggest disappointment in a game.

I feel like I wasted days trying to solve the game only to be let down. You do not expect such a crappy ending from any game, but it is enough to turn me off from the entire Virtual Villager franchise.

Will I be playing chapter two of the game series? Maybe for review
purposes, but after all the crap the first game puts you through I
doubt I will enjoy it.

Star Rating:

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Coming in at 99 minutes, The Descent was listed as one of the most terrifying movies you will ever see. So, naturally as a horror movie connoisseur, I just had to see it. I have been of the firm belief that America lacks the originality to make a good scary movie and has for some time now. The horror movies that come out these days are not scary. Usually they are remade, boring, or pathetic. This movie falls in line perfectly with what I’ve just said.

Within moments, the husband and child of Sarah are dead. A car accident leaves Sarah alone. You soon begin to understand that Sarah, Beth, and Juno go on one major trip a year to experience danger. Well, it is a year later and Juno is bringing the girls to the wilderness to go exploring in a cave.

The girls decide to go caving with three additional friends, or rather two friends, and a friend of Juno’s. Sam, a future doctor, and Rebecca, are sisters. Holly is the new member the group, but seems to manage quite well nonetheless. As we meet these girls there is alcohol and conversation you would not expect women older than teenagers to have. This portion of the movie is, at best, boring.

Now it’s time, finally, to go into the cave. As you go in you can hear a voice telling you how dangerous cave exploring can be. You can become claustrophobic, delusional, and panic can set in if there is trouble. Obviously, this means that trouble will be setting in. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out where this movie is going at this point.

Of course, we don’t know all the places it will go, nor will we understand why it had to go there. The girls get stuck, as expected, and are fighting to find the way out of this cave. A cave, mind you, that was not on the map, and picked by Juno so the girls could all be hero’s when they discovered the ins and outs of the location. Whoops. I am thinking that was the first mistake. Still not scary, but maybe we are getting there? Well, maybe.

As the girls remain in the cave, Sarah begins having delusions. She is seeing men that the other girls say are made up. About this time Holly begins frolicking through the cave, towards the light, and breaks her leg. As her leg is being pressed back into place it is not scary. It’s gross. It’s not even good gross because the majority of time the frame is on Holly’s face and not her messed up leg. A few grunts and groans later we’re back in (yawning) business and bound to find a way out of the cave!

One of my favorite parts of this scene is where the soon-to-be doctor, Sam, tells everyone that Holly will not be able to put any pressure at all on her broken leg. In the next scene, Holly is hobbling through the cave. I do not know if people normally travel caves without touching both feet to the ground, but apparent Holly is a skilled cave hopper, literally.

Holly’s disability does not matter much though because she is about to become dinner. A deformed, human-ish, life form comes out of nowhere and eats her. These things, known as crawlers, are blind, slimy-white, bald, and generally disgusting. They make sounds that make you want to smash a mallet through their heads so they will shut up. Oh, and they like to eat loud, screaming idiots that happen to be stuck in caves.

The crawlers are not scary. I like to think of the film, at this point, as a bad Michael Jackson video that you simply cannot turn away from even though you know you should. You want the he-he’s to end and yet you have to see the final clip. You know it’s going to be bad, but since you’ve already spent this much time waiting to die, you might as well put the last nail in the coffin.

Together, Dominick and I watched as one by one the girls die at the hands of the crawlers. As they try to escape the cave they inform each other that the crawlers are blind and can only go off the sounds that they hear. Yet, oddly enough, they still continue to scream and holler. Soon, the girls split up, and of course, the majority, die.

By the end of this movie I was wishing that the crawlers would fly through the screen and eat me just so I could stop watching. This was not a horror movie. A horror movie is something terrifying that may or may not be able to happen, but is frightening nonetheless. I suppose if you like exploring caves that have never been discovered this could scare you. I, however, did not find it to be very scary. Mundane and typical of today’s horror scene is more like it.

The Bottom Line - At best this horror movie is nothing more than comedic sci-fi. If you want to be scared do not watch this movie because, chances are, you won’t be. If you are like me you will not be scared, but you will be offended that you just watched a worse form of The Blair Witch Project. You would think, when it comes to hyped-up horror (gone bad) I would have learned the first time.

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